Facebook Blasts from an Old Queer

Tracey TieF

CW: homophobic violence; terrorism

February 10, 2021 — WE STRUGGLED FOR THE FREEDOM TO LIVE OPENLY. NEXT GEN, NEVER LET US DOWN.⁠

When I lived in a Queer Anarchist house in the 1980s, we hosted lesbian mothers on the run, charged with kidnapping their own children because they had been judged to be unfit solely on the basis of their sexual orientation. My first chiropractor was the first gay man awarded custody of his own teenager. When we performed The Rubber Rap, an AIDS education song, at Gay Pride Day, the police line enclosed the Neo-NAZIs so they could attack us by throwing objects. When I asked a cop what he was there for, if not to protect us, he said, "I am here to protect the public." In 1990, I served as a security team leader at the Gay Games in Vancouver, because being LGBTQ disqualified athletes from competing in the Olympics, and because the police would not guard the stadium against the religious bigots who swarmed at the gates. We had to pour the ashes of our friends and lovers on the steps of the houses of power just to get them to respond to the AIDS pandemic. ⁠

Our lives did not matter.⁠

Because we struggled, many survived.⁠

Silence = Death.⁠

Never ever be silent in the face of inequality and injustice.⁠

January 27, 2021 — FUN TALKING POINTS FOR COVID DENIERS

When the AIDS crisis hit, many people including government and even health officials said it didn't matter because it was mostly gay people or IV drug users or sex workers who were affected. So when we hear that COVID isn't a problem because it's only killing BIPOC and people with existing conditions, we are like HELLO HERE WE GO AGAIN.

I THINK IT'S TELLING THAT NOT ONE OF MY ANARCHIST FRIENDS THINKS COVID IS A HOAX. You'd think we anti-establishment, anti-authoritarian types would be all about the conspiracies, and ignoring public health. Count on us for a lot of fierce defiance, but we have read history and we believe in germs, and how pandemics frack over BIPOC prisoners and people who are poor.

March 9, 2017 — HAPPY BIRTHDAY FROM MY ACQUAINTANCES

Fascinatingly, most of the delightful mob of birthday wishes are from people I only know on Facebook. I am thinking about my dearly departed friend and commune mate, Michael Smith, taken by AIDS in the early years of that apocalypse and his talk of co-immunity. Co-immunity is our external immune system. Our connectedness keeps us safe. Let us invite deeper, realer connections. Our interdependence makes us human. God-dess comes in our midst when we gather for good. So just like you, a stranger, reached out to give me a birthday wish, I invite us all to reach out and pay a little forward every day. To the Bunz. To those who heart a hurting stranger on FB. To those who smile at passers-by. To those who donate their change at the cash. You make every day a little happier.

November 6, 2016 — THE POLICE CONFISCATED OUR SAFER SEX VIDEO PROJECT

David Findlay and I made a safer sex, safer needle-use video featuring all the cool kids. To make a long anecdote short, my video camera and the master tape were stolen and recovered in a bust with a lot of porn. Our master tape was entitled Children of Disobedience after the statement by Jerry Fallwell that AIDS was the wrath of God upon the children of disobedience. Well, the cops thought it was child porn. And the law says that child porn is when someone is or appears to be under 18. So us all barely being older than that, and having shot some group make-out scene on the roof of the warehouse occupied by the Bunch of Fucking Goofs...we were up shit creek. Luckily our production values were non-commercial, and after the police interrogated me, I got the camera back but not the video…

June 30, 2016 — BECAUSE OF ORLANDO; A POEM

This is the rainbow-flag-waving, speech-poem-reflection thing I am giving at SpiritFest this Pride weekend. Thanks to Cortney Cassidy for The Talk.

We are grieving.

Lost to high school suicide

80’s AIDS - like an Apocalypse

Hung from her baby blanket

Overdosed

shot shot shot shot shot

to death.

We are tired.

“Now that gay marriage is legal, what more do you people want?”

To stay alive, for one thing.

We are angry.

The safe places aren’t safe

from regretted police raids

from restroom second guessers

and self-hating wife-beating men with legal weapons.

We thought it was over.

We are heartbroken.

Rest in Peace Luis, when I was 20 I was excited, too.

Rest in Peace Anthony, when I was 25 I danced, too.

Rest in Peace Deonka, when I was 32 I thought I belonged, too.

Rest in Peace Kimberly, when I was 37 I loved, too.

Rest in Peace Javier, when I turned 40 I saw it gets better, too.

I could have been you.

But your life was stolen and we are heartbroken.

We can and should do better.

We are called to a deeper and stronger love in the face of hate.

Because Love Must Win.

June 14, 2016 — THE ORLANDO MASSACRE

I have proof that the Orlando massacre was an act of terrorism. All I can think of are the LGBTQ people I know who have died or been killed. The love of my youth hanged. Schoolmate suicide. AIDS. AIDS. AIDS. Overdose. The only times I've ever had to escape marauding men with weapons, meaning the police, when I was at queer clubs. It was an act of terrorism against queers. Terrorism terrorizes. So all the blaze happy joy gay weddings lesbian new mothers trans positivity are replaced with the old feelings. Dark bars, safety in numbers (even if that isn't safe) and the suspicion like the white noise of a jet in my head that despised = disposable. That self-hating gunman did not act for ISIL, he acted on behalf of millions of Americans who normalize their sociopathic hatred. It's terrorism that has nothing to do with Muslim extremists. Just hetero extremists.